Monday, February 27, 2006
Dear Diary,
I know you all want me to continue my story. But once in a while, its good to take a break, turn away from the past and look in the mirror. Look at the present.
I am doing fine, the A level results are coming out on WED and I keeping every avaliable finger crossed. Maybe I should try making my rounds around places of worship, SIGH...
Oh well whats done is done. GO Pek GO GO Pek GO
"WE ARE SORRY TO INTERUPPT WHATEVER U ARE DOING"
"ZaaaAaaAaaAaaaaAAAAA ZAaaaAAAaAAAAAaaaaAaaaaaa"
-Change Screen-
The following message is brought to you by the Ministry Of Pek Affairs
From the Department of Eye Sight
From the Author of "I can write whatever I want"
Here is Pek's take on the 2 balls on your face.
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Dear Diary,
What do you see when you first open your eyes. Be it for school, for work or just simply making sure you are not dead. What do you see?? Maybe a spinning fan on the ceiling, an overheading air conditioning unit or your window which shows a sunny or still darken sky. This is common, we all go thru this everyday as we open our eyes to welcome a New Day.
However I urge you to take a closer look. I am different from most of you and yet I share the same fate as about 30-40% of the world's population. My daily ritual of getting up isnt stretching your arms and letting out a big yawn. The only Stretching I do is lifting up my arms over my head and feeling the ledge for my spectacles.
Unlike most of you, I do not have the joy of opening your eyes to a bright a clear world. I did once, but that was some 10 over years or so ago.
I wake up to the same world, just that mine isnt as clear as most of you.Sometimes I dont even dare open my eyes in the morning before I put on my artifical eyes. U may wonder just what I see through these eyes of mine.
I have a degree of over 450++ on both eyes. The one thing I hate the most is not being able to see lines. Its just like using Mircosoft Paint, whenever u wan to use the bucket Icon you first need to Define the area you want painted. I cant do that. It seems my mind cannot register lines. Only colours.
Yes I see them, Black is black, Blue is blue, Yellow is yellow. But at the edge of the so called "Lines", the colours merge.There is no proper ending. Its like everything is fixed in ONE big picture and the other thing that differentiate a table from a chair is my mind. For example imagine a picture of just red on top and Blue below. From top to bottom I see red then suddenly a Blurred area where the Line is suppose to me, then blue all the way to the bottom.
Take away my aid and I can still tell you one object from another at a suitable range. However this has little to do with my sigh, my brain is telling me what I see. Or rather my brain is telling what my eyes are seeing and not the other way around. Give me a picture to look at and all I can tell you are some of the brighter colours and nothing more. Ask me to describe the picture and all I can say are the general images that my brain tells me.
In my natural state I cant see details, not to mention read a book normally. I can read, only at kissing range. I can see your face but must take a closer look to know who you are or whether you are smiling.
Its so frustrating sometimes. Being half blind, what I consider myself to be is no laughing matter. Take away my glasses and all accuracy in vision disappears, I am helpless. Try to hide my glasses somewhere and I will be on my knees using my hands, my sense of touch to feel it out. Or otherwise I'll just beat u up because its faster and a human is much easier to find. I get a headache sometimes without my glasses. Unfortunately it has became part of me, we move as one body, separated only during bedtime or bath time.
Although it has helped me over the years, this invention has its side effects. My mind has slowly forgotten how to tell how eyeto focus or rather the muscles in my eye to contract or relax. If our body has a way of repairing itself, this equipment has done nothing but causes the problem to worsen. To put it in simple terms, ironically, my spectacles has caused my eyes the ability to see a Defined World. Sinking me deeper and deeper into a pit I can never get out of. (unless I go under the knife)
Through theses pieces of plastic I see the world of lines and colours again. But everytime I view the world I am constantly reminded of my state by the frames of my spectacles still in my line of sight. That is why I love to put on contact lenses instead. No more frames! It really feels great to be able to experience perfect vision without the burden of adjusting your falling spectacles. This maybe a small thing to some of you, But to me being able to have NORMAL eyesight, even if its through cheating means of wearing contact lenses is a joy.
I have been wanting to write this in a long long time. This is just one of the little things people take for granted since our sense of sight is probably one of the first sense we use since we were born. Sadly this is also one of the things we regret only when its too late, thus no matter what people say, we still stare at our computer screen for hours on end.
Thus I urge you to take care of your eyesight. I am not blind, but at least I can understand just a little bit more about not being able to see clearly. Stop myopia, and this starts from you and no one else.
Till the nxt episode on Pek's 101... TATATATA
Shut the Fuck up And listen -2:25 AM